Hey, Hot Stuff!
by jankitty13
Summary: Life was as it always was for Marinette DuPain-Cheng: filled with fashion designs; posters of fashion model Adrien "Just a Friend" Agreste; chocolate chip cookies; and the cute ladybug kwami better known as Tikki. Oh, and there was Chat Noir, Paris's famous leather-clad, feline based superhero, currently arguing with Marinette about her "secret" crush.


Happy Thanksgiving _,_ Miraculers! Consider this an unofficial sequel to _CopyCat!_

I do not, unfortunately, own Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Chat Noir. The genius Thomas Astruc does.

* * *

It was just another ordinary day in the life of one Miss Marinette Dupain-Cheng, aged 14.

Life was as it always was: filled with fashion designs; posters of handsome fashion model Adrien "Just a Friend" Agreste; chocolate chip cookies, still warm from the oven; and the cute, ridiculously adorable lucky ladybug kwami better known as Tikki.

Oh, and there was Chat Noir, Paris's famous leather-clad, feline based superhero, who was currently sipping homemade cocoa while arguing with Marinette.

"I'm just saying Princess, that if you didn't stutter so much, your crush would totally would notice you more."

Yep, that's right. Chat was arguing with Marinette over talking (confessing) to her crush. (Ironically, he is unaware of just _who_ the crush in question was. Oblivious sunshine boy.)

"Stutter? What do you mean stutter? I-I don't st-stutter when I talk about my crush." Marinette (with a rather cute red blush on her face, in Chat Noir's opinion) hotly denied.

"You just did." Chat deadpanned.

She flushed into a deeper red, redder that her Ladybug outfit (dramatic author reveal!). "Shut up! So what if I stutter when I talk about him? I bet you do the same thing when it comes to Ladybug!"

"Do you stutter when you talk to him?"

"...no?"

"You do! Omigosh, you totally do!" Chat started laughing. "Gee, Princess, I never thought you of all people would be so timid when talking to the boy you like!"

Marinette's face started steaming. "I am not!"

"You are~!" He leaned down until he was face level with her face. "Bet you can't even talk to him. With all that stuttering, there's no way he could even understand you, much less talk to you," He leaned even closer with a smirk. "Much less _go out with you,"_ he teased.

If there was one thing people should know about Marinette Dupain-Cheng, it was that she couldn't really handle teasing. She grew up with a father who used to tease her while playing Mecha Strike; she grew up with Le Chien Kim, who made fun of her tiny size as a child; and she grew up with Chloe Bourgeois, who relentlessly heaped harsh criticism on Marinette's appearance, clothes, lifestyle, and background. (A/N: Man, Audrey Bourgeois did a wonder on her daughter!)

So naturally, when Chat Noir teased Marinette over her crush, she may or may not have snapped and made a rather drastic decision that she would later come to regret.

"Fine, you think I can't talk to my crush on the phone? Well, I can! And I'll prove it to you right here, right now!"

And with that, she picked up her phone, dialed a number (which was definitely not on speed dial. Nope, no way), and waited.

Of course, being her natural clumsy, absent-minded self, she left her phone on speaker (by accident), so naturally, when the call went straight to voicemail, Chat Noir could hear this, loud and clear:

 _"You have reached Adrien Agreste. Please leave a message."_

Cue massive jaw-dropping from our favorite cat resident.

By jaw-dropping, I mean that his chin fell to the ground, his tongue rolled out, and his eyes popped open.

Oh, and he lost some of his perfect, sparkling white teeth. (A/N: I envy.)

Not that Marinette noticed. Upon realizing she had, once again, reached Adrien "I'm secretly a Cinnamon Roll" Agreste's voice mail (seriously, doesn't that boy ever listen to his phone?), she had all but lost her bravado.

(Cue the stuttering.)

"H-h-hello? Is this Adrien? I mean, of course, it's Adrien, who else could it be?" She started laughing nervously. "Ha ha ha ha."

Let it be known that fake-laughing has never sound so... _fake_.

"Anyway, this Meowinette." There was a pregnant pause. "I-I-I mean _Marinette_! This is _Marinette_!" She started laughing again.

"But then you already knew this, 'cause you know, this is my phone number calling. Calling _you_ , that is." She coughed.

"A-a-anyways, I'm just calling to say that me got a you on crush. I mean, I mean I have a _crush_ on _you_!"

(By now, our lovable black cat may or may not have started drooling from having his jaw open for too long.)

(He even looks nice while drooling!)

"Well, technically, it's more that a crush. It's the real deal, real as a bee sting! (A/N: ouch!)" She paused again. "No, wrong metaphor! That's too much like Queen Bee!"

(Elsewhere, Chloe Bourgeois sneezed over her newly painted nails. "Ew, gross! Sabrina! Get me some nail polish remover and some new paint, stat!")

("Yes, Chloe!")

Marinette was having trouble spitting out the next few words. So, she, in a desperate attempt to get it over with, decided to say the first thing that came to mind. "What I'm trying to say is..that is..let's just say that its..." she took a deep breath, "Hey, hot stuff, this here's the _cat's meow_!" she blurted out.

"..."

"..."

"..." (Were those crickets chirping?)

Marinette cursed. "Darn that stupid cat, he put those bad puns in my head!"

(Chat Noir, still sitting on her chaise, flinched.)

"N-not that I hate cats or anything! I like cats, i just love hamsters like you do. And I know this because I saw you walk into a pet store once!" another pregnant pause. "Not that I was following you or anything. Heh Heh." (Oh, God, the crickets had returned!)

(Chat started having major flashbacks of a mysterious blue blur that had been following him (well, Adrien "Oblivious is my middle name" Agreste) around for the past two weeks. Had that been _her?!)_

"So, anyway, Um, the thing is I...I...," she stammered, "I-I-Ihaveamajorcrushmaybeloveforyouanditis _freaking me like crazy_!"

Chat may or may not have stopped breathing for ten minutes straight.

(He almost done died.)

Meanwhile, Marinette panicked. "You know what this is not coming out like I planned. Not that this whole thing was staged . Nope, not at all!"

 _Oh God, shut up, me._

"I-I-I can't do this. I'm sorry, i'lltalksomeothertime, byyyyyyyyyeeeeeeee!"

And with that, she hung up on Adrien "I don't understand romance" Agreste's voice mail with a resounding _click!._

She sighed. "Oh God, I hope he never listens to this." Then-

 _Beep! "To save this message, press one. To delete, press two."_

It turns out Marinette did _not_ hang up like she thought she had. Instead she had, once again, reached the operator.

Naturally, she panicked...again.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Diving for the phone like a cat hunting a mouse (more cat puns, really? Really.), Marinette grabed her phone and pressed- _stabbed_ -at the number pad. She managed to press one!

"Phew! Saved!"

 _"Message saved. Goodbye."_

...or maybe not.

"No. No, no, no. NO! NOOOOO!" Marinette all but screamed at the poor, innocent, absurdly pink phone (which she was currently crushing to death. There were cracks!).

"This can't be happening! This just. can. not. be. HAPPPENING?!"

Chat Noir, who, until now, had been quietly (meekly) observing the failed confession act from his place on the chaise, watched Marinette's meltdown with open fascination. He shook himself out of his stupor, cleared his throat, and tried to speak.

"Princess-" He began.

"Chat! I have to go!" she interrupted him. "I'll be back soon, I have to steal, I mean, I-I have to get-I-I-I just need to go!"

"...okay."

"And please don't tell anyone what just happened!"

(In her upset state, while she said that, she may or may not have turned around to give huge, watering, bluebell puppy shaped eyes capable of melting even _Chloe's_ heart.)

What else could Chat Noir say?

"I swear. Cat's honor."

And so Marinette up and dusted out of the house faster that you can say Chat Noir is Adrien Agreste. (A/N: Hah! Spoiler Alert!)

Chat started at the dust trail she left behind, then took out his baton which he secretly linked to his civilian phone, went straight to voice mail, and pressed play.

" _H-h-hello? Is this Adrien? I mean..."_

* * *

 _"...Ihaveamajorcrushmaybeloveforyouanditis_ freaking me like crazy _!"_

"Adrien, when are you going to delete that? It's boring me." Plagg swooped around Adrien "Mister Sunshine himself" Agreste's head, watching, with a rather disgusted expression on his face, as the young miraculous holder gazed sappily- _sappily!_ -at his phone, which was currently on repeat.

"Never, Plagg." He sighed- _swooned!_ -as he looked dreamily at at Marintte's DuPain-Cheng's picture as his phone saver. (He may or may not have taken the picture while she had been freaking out over her failed confession to Adrien "I'm Secretly Chat Noir" Agreste.)

"Ugh! You really shouldn't have saved that message, it's killing the mood." Plagg complained. "I can barely sleep in all this mushy gooiness, it's distgusting~!"

"Oh, shut up, Plagg. Here, eat your Camembert." He tossed Plagg an entire wheel, which Plagg happily gobbled up in tow point three seconds flat.

"Cheese~!" Plagg moaned happily while rubbing his tummy. Meanwhile, Adrien's phone message was ending again.

 _"...Ihaveamajorcrushmaybeloveforyouanditis_ freaking me like crazy _!"_

" _Sigh!_ Oh, _Marinette~!"_


End file.
